Raymond Butcher

My grandad died on the 24th January 2005 of cancer!
what can i say about my grandad? he was an amazing man, a family man. along with my nan he raised 8
children 5 girls and 3 boys one of which was badly handicapped mentally and physically ( my unk who
i have also done a page for) he was a hard worker while his children were small, always made sure
the family had what they needed and that never stopped until the day he passed. As i got older i saw
my grandad as a person not just a figure and realized how marvolous he really was.. everyone seemed
to look up to him and he had alot of respect for and from ppl. he also loved his jokes.. makes me
smile just to think of him standing in the kitchen with his newspaper, he would tell us all a joke
which wasnt even very funny but he would laugh for ages and get ready to tell the next person who
walked through the door. He was rally easy to get along with no matter what your age, he had friends
of all different ages, male and female and when you spoke to him you would feel as though you had
known him for years. If you ever had a problem no matter how big or small he would always be there
to help you out. Even when i fell pregnant at 16, although i could tell he was so disappointed he
put his arm around me and let me know he was here for me. i looked upon him as a father... not a
grandfather... as did my children. they would often shout out dad as we was out shopping, the looks
we would get from ppl was amusing.
cyprus was a love spot for my grandad he and my nan would go every year.. he made so many friends
that even restruant owners from there would sent a xmas card to him every year.


i could carry on writting all day but no amount of words could explain how amazing he was.
then while on holiday in 2004 he became ill.. coming home early he went to the doctors and was told
he had intigestion.... after this going on for 5-6 months a new doctor sent my grandad for
tests..... CANCER came the result! That word scares alot of ppl... my grandad was one of them. he
became weak so fast but doctors told us they could operate on it and remove it. xmas came and that
was the first time i saw this proud man actully cry as his granddaughter (me) had to drill a hole in
the wall to hang up a santa figure for my uncle as my grandad was too weak to do it! that broke my
heart.
after xmas he started to go down hill fast... he couldnt eat... couldnt drink, we was to worried
that my mother and i went to see his doctor and begged him to do something. he suggested having him
put either in hospital or a hospice where he can be put on drips for fluid and food, because unless
he built himself up he couldnt have the op as he was too weak. we agreed to put him into our local
hospice as there he would get 1 on 1 care whereas a hospial was shared care.
when we told him he asked us not to put him there saying " when you go in those places you never
come out alive" we told him not to be silly and that they was going to help him get better.
after a few days of him being in the hospice he still didnt have any drips up and now struggled to
get out of bed.... we spoke to a doctor who was looking after him... nothing could have prepared me
for what i heard next... that thursday afternoon me and my mum was told there was nothing they could
do for him... my grandad was going to die!! that walk home went by in a haze as me and my mum just
cryed.
we got back to my nans and i had to sit and tell my nan and my aunts that the man in our lifes was
going to die and theres was nothing we could do.
we decided that we wasnt going to let him die in there like he told us he would, but we would bring
him home to be with his family. doctors asked us to wait until the monday before we took him home as
they wanted to get his mdeication on the right dose before he left... we agreed.

sunday evening i spoke to my mum on the phone and told her i was going to get the bus early in the
morning to see my grandad and keep him company till my nan and aunt got up there later in the day to
collect him (as he didnt like to be alone).
monday morning came and my mum called just as i was leaving to take my kids to school and go get the
bus... she told me my nan and aunt was going up early if i wasnt to go with them instead of getting
the bus... after i put my kids into school at 9am i went to my nans instead of getting the bus... my
mum was there as well as 1 of my aunts... we sat waiting for my other aunt to turn up as she was
driving us up there... then at 10:13 the phone rang... my aunt answered and passed the phone to my
nan telling her it was the hospice calling.. we thought they was letting us know that he was ready
to go..... my nan took the phone... seconds later screams filled the room.... my grandad had gone.
words cannot describe how our world fell apart at that moment... not only did he die in a place we
put him in... but he died alone.
i live my life now on if only's... coz if only i had got that bus... i would have been with him when
he went... he wouldnt have been alone.

people say time heels pain.... well on the 24th of this month it will be 2 years that he passed..
and i can say the pain inside is still as raw as that day.... time makes it easier to live with but
the pain never goes away.

heaven has alot to answer for.... so they can have an angel in a million... they took away 1 of
earths greatest heros!!!